When two masters meet

Question: Should one first come to terms with one's own Loneliness before entering into Relationship?

Osho: Yes, you have to come to terms with your loneliness, so much so that the loneliness is transformed into aloneness. Only then will you be capable of moving into a deep enriching relationship. Only then will you be able to move into love. What do I mean when I say that one has to come to terms with one's loneliness, so much so that it becomes aloneness?

Loneliness is a negative state of mind. Aloneness is positive, notwithstanding what the dictionaries say. In dictionaries, loneliness and aloneness are synonymous -- they are synonyms; in life they are not. Loneliness is a state of mind when you are constantly missing the other, aloneness is the state of mind when you are constantly delighted in yourself. Loneliness is miserable, aloneness is blissful. Loneliness is always worried, missing something, hankering for something, desiring for something; aloneness is a deep fulfillment, not going out, tremendously content, happy, celebrating. In loneliness you are off center, in aloneness you are centered and rooted. Aloneness is beautiful. It has an elegance around it, a grace, a climate of tremendous satisfaction. Loneliness is; beggarly; all around it there is begging and nothing else. It has no grace around it. In fact it is ugly. Loneliness is a dependence, aloneness is SHEER independence. One feels as if one is one's whole world, one's whole existence.

Now, if you move into a relationship when you are feeling lonely, then you will exploit the other. The other will become a means to satisfy you. You will use the other, and everybody resents being used because no man is here to become a means for anybody else. Every man is an end unto himself. Nobody is here to be used like a thing, everybody is here to be worshipped like a king. Nobody is here to fulfill anybody else's expectations, everybody is here just to be himself.
So whenever you move in any relationship out of loneliness, the relationship is already on the rocks. Even before it has started, it is already on the rocks. Even before the birth, the child is dead. It is going to create more misery for you. And remember, when you move from your loneliness you will fall in relationship with somebody who is in the same plight, because no man who is really living his aloneness will be attracted towards you. You will be too below him. He can, at the most, sympathize, but cannot love you. One who is on his peak of aloneness can only be attracted towards somebody who is also alone. So whenever you move out of loneliness, you will find a man of the same type; you will find your own reflection somewhere.

Two beggars will meet, two miserable people will meet. And remember, when two miserable people meet, it is not an ordinary addition, it is a multiplication. They create much more misery for each other than they could have created in their loneliness.

First become alone. First start enjoying yourself. First love yourself. First become so authentically happy that if nobody comes it doesn't matter; you are full, overflowing. If nobody knocks at your door it is perfectly okay -- YOU are not missing. You are not waiting for somebody to come and knock at the door. You are at home. If somebody comes, good, beautiful. If nobody comes, that too is beautiful and good.

THEN move into relationship. Now you move like a master, not like a beggar. Now you move like an emperor,. not like a beggar. And the person who has lived in his aloneness will always be attracted to another person who is also living his aloneness beautifully, because the same attracts the same. When two masters meet -- masters of their being, of their aloneness -- happiness is not just added, it is multiplied. It becomes a tremendous phenomenon of celebration. And they don't exploit, they share. They don't use each other. Rather, on the contrary, they both become one and enjoy the existence that surrounds them.

Two lonely people are always facing each other, confronting. Two people who have known aloneness are together, facing something higher than both. I always give this example: two ordinary lovers who are both lonely always face each other; two real lovers, on a full moon night, will not be facing each other. They may be holding hands, but they will be facing the full moon high in the sky. They will not be facing each other, they will be together facing something else. Sometimes they will be listening to a symphony of Mozart or Beethoven or Wagner together. Sometimes they will be sitting by the side of a tree and enjoying the tremendous being of the tree enveloping them. Sometimes they may be sitting by a waterfall and listening to the wild music that is continuously being created there. Sometimes, by the ocean, they will both be looking to the farthest possibility that the eyes can see.

Whenever two lonely persons meet, they look at each other, because they are constantly in search of ways and means to exploit the other: how to use the other, how to be happy through the other. But two persons who are deeply contented within themselves are not trying to use each other. Rather, they become fellow travellers; they move on a pilgrimage. The goal is high, the goal is far away. Their common interest joins them together.

Ordinarily the common interest is sex. Sex can join two persons momentarily and casually, and very superficially. Real lovers have a greater common interest. It is not that sex will not be there; it may be there, but as part of a higher harmony. Listening to Mozart's or Beethoven's symphony, they may come so close, so close, so close, that there may be love. They may make love to each other, but it is in the greater harmony of a Beethoven symphony. The symphony was the real thing; the love happens as part of it. And when love happens of its own accord, unsought, unthought, simply happens as part of a higher harmony, it has a totally different quality to it. it is divine, it is no longer human.

The word 'happiness' comes from a Scandanavian word 'hap'. The word'happening' also comes from the same Scandant the most, you can be available to it. Whenever it happens, it happens.

Two real loavian root. Happiness is that which happens. You cannot produce it, you cannot command it, you cannot force it. Avers are always available, but never thinking, never trying to find happiness. Then they are never frustrated, because whenever it happens it happens. They create the situation. In fact, if you are happy with yourself, you are already the situation, and if the other is also happy with himself or herself, she is also the situation. When these two situations come close, a greater situation is created. In that greater situation much happens -- nothing is produced.

Man has not to do anything to be happy. Man has just to flow and let go.
So, the question is: should one first come to terms with his own loneliness before entering into relationship? Yes; yes, absolutely. It has to be so, otherwise you will be frustrated, and in the name of love you will be doing something else which is not love at all.

Source - Osho Book "Come Follow To You, Vol 4"

the sannyasin is one..

To me, the sannyasin is one who lives life like an actor. If someone wants to blossom in sannyas living in the thick of the world, he should cease to be a doer and become an actor, become a witness. He should live in the thick of life, play his role, and at the same time be a witness to it, but in no way should he be deeply involved in his role, be attached to it. He should cross the river in a way that his feet remain untouched by the water. It is, however, difficult to cross a river without letting the water touch your feet, but it is quite possible to live in the world without getting involved in it, without being tied to it.

- Osho

Accept Yourself

The moment you accept yourself you become open, you become vulnerable, you become receptive. The moment you accept yourself there is no need for any future because there is no need to improve upon anything. Then all is good, then all is good as it is. In that very experience life starts taking a new colour, a new music arises.
If you accept yourself, that is the beginning of accepting all. If you reject yourself you are basically rejecting the universe; if you reject yourself you are rejecting existence. If you accept yourself you have accepted existence; then there is nothing else to do but to enjoy, to celebrate. There is no complaint left, there is no grudge; you feel good. Then life is good and death is good, then joy is good and sadness is good, then to be with your beloved is good and to be alone is good. Then whatsoever happens is good because it happens out of the whole.

But you have been conditioned for centuries not to accept yourself. All the cultures of the world have been poisoning the human mind because they all depend on one thing: Improve yourself. They all create anxiety in you - anxiety is the tense state between that which you are and that which you should be. People are bound to remain anxious if there is a "should" in life. If there is an ideal that has to be fulfilled, how can you be at ease? How can you be at home? It is impossible to live anything totally because the mind is hankering for the future. And that future never comes - it cannot come. By the very nature of your desire it is impossible. When it comes you will start imagining other things, you will start desiring other things. You can always imagine a better state of affairs. And you can always remain in anxiety, tense, worried-that's how humanity has been living for centuries.

Only rarely, once in a while, has a man escaped out of the trap.
That man is called a Buddha. a Christ. The awakened man is one who has slipped out of the trap of society, who has seen that this is just absurdity. You cannot improve yourself. And I am not saying that improvement does not happen, remember – but you cannot improve yourself. When you stop improving yourself, life improves you. In that relaxation, in that acceptance, life starts caressing you, life starts flowing through you. And when you don't have any grudge, any complaint, you bloom, you flower.
So I would like to say to you: Accept yourself as you are. And that is the most difficult thing in the world because it goes against your training, your education, your culture. From the very beginning you have been told how you should be. Nobody has ever told you that you are good as you are; they have all put programs in your mind. You have been programmed by parents, by priests, politicians, teachers - you have been programmed for only one thing: Just go on improving upon yourself. Wherever you are, go on rushing for something else. Never rest. Work unto death.
My teaching is simple: Don't postpone life. Don't wait for tomorrow, it never comes. Live it today!
Jesus says to his disciples "Look at the lilies in the field. They toil not, they weave not, they spin not - yet even Solomon was not so beautiful as these poor lily flowers." What is the beauty of the poor flower? It is in utter acceptance. It has no program in its being to improve. It is here now - dancing in the wind, taking a sunbath, talking to the clouds, falling asleep in the afternoon warmth, flirting with the butterflies ... enjoying, being, loving, being loved.
And the whole existence starts pouring its energy into you when you are open. Then the trees are greener than they look to you now, then the sun is sunnier than it looks to you now; then everything becomes psychedelic, becomes colorful. Otherwise everything is drab and dull and gray.
Accept yourself - that is prayer. Accept yourself - that IS gratitude.
Relax into your being-this is the way God wanted you to be. In no other way did he want you to be; otherwise he would have made you somebody else. He has made you you and nobody else. Trying to improve upon yourself is basically trying to improve upon God, which is just stupid, and you will get madder and madder in trying that. You will not arrive anywhere, you will have simply missed a great opportunity.
Let this be your colour: acceptance.
Let this be your characteristic: acceptance, utter acceptance. And then you will be surprised: Life is always ready to shower its gifts on you. Life is not a Miser, existence always gives abundantly - but we cannot receive it because we don't feel that we are worthy to receive it.
That's why people cling to miseries - they suit their programming. People go on punishing themselves in a thousand and one subtle ways. Why? Because that fits with the program. If you are not as you should be, you have to punish yourself, you have to create misery for yourself. That's why people feel good when they are miserable.
Let me say it: People feel happy when they are miserable; they become very, very uneasy when they are happy. This is my observation of thousands and thousands of people: When they are miserable, everything is as it should be. They accept it - it fits with their conditioning, with their mind. They know how horrible they are, they know that they are sinners.
You have been told that you are born in sin. What stupidity! What nonsense! Man is not born in sin, man is born in innocence. There has never been any original sin, there has only been original innocence. Each child is born in innocence. We make him feel guilty; we start saying, "This should not be. You should be like this." And the child is natural and innocent. We punish him for being natural and innocent, and we reward him for being artificial and cunning. We reward him for being phony-all our rewards are for phony people. If somebody is innocent, we don't give any reward; we don't have any regard for him, we don't have any respect for him. The innocent is condemned, the innocent is thought to be almost synonymous with the criminal. The innocent is thought to be foolish, the cunning is thought to be intelligent. The phony is accepted - the phony fits with the phony society.
Then your whole life will be nothing but an effort to create more and more punishments for yourself. And whatsoever you do is wrong, so you have to punish yourself for every joy. Even when joy comes in spite of yourself - mind you, when joy comes in spite of yourself, when sometimes God simply bumps into you and you cannot avoid him - immediately you start punishing yourself. Something has gone wrong - how can this happen to a horrible person like you?
Just the other night a man asked me, "You talk, Osho, about love, you talk of offering your love. But what have I got to give to anybody? What have I got to offer to my beloved?"
This is the secret idea of everybody: "I have nothing." What do you not have? But nobody has told you that you have all the beauties of all the f1owers, because mall is the greatest flower on this earth, the most evolved being. No bird can sing the song that you can sing-the birds' songs are just noises, although they are still beautiful because they come out of innocence. You can sing far better songs, of greater significance, of much more meaning. But you ask, "What have I got?"
The trees are green, beautiful, the stars are beautiful and the rivers are beautiful-but have you ever seen anything more beautiful than a human eye? Have you ever come across anything more beautiful than human eyes? On the whole earth there is nothing more delicate than the human eyes - no rose can compete, no lotus can compete. And what depth! But you want to know, "What have I got to offer in love?" You must have lived a self-condemning life; you must have been putting yourself down, burdening yourself with guilt.
In fact, when somebody loves you, you are a little bit surprised.
"What-me? A person loves me?" The idea arises in your mind: "Because he does not know me, that's why. If he comes to know me, if he comes to see through me, he will never love me." So lovers start hiding themselves from each other. They keep many things private, they don't open their secrets because they are afraid that the moment they open their heart, the love is bound to disappear - because they cannot love themselves, how can they conceive of anybody else loving them?
Love starts with self-love. Don't be selfish but be self-full; they are two different things. Don't be a Narcissus, don't be obsessed with yourself. But a natural self-love is a must, a basic phenomenon. Only then out of it can you love somebody else.
Accept yourself - love yourself: you are God's creation. God's signature is on you, and you are special - unique. Nobody else has ever been like you, and nobody else will ever be like you - you are simply unique, incomparable. Accept this, love this, celebrate this - and in that very celebration you will start seeing the uniqueness of the others, the incomparable beauty of the others. Love is possible only when there is a deep acceptance of oneself, the other, the world. Acceptance creates the milieu in which love grows, the soil in which love blooms.

"One who lets go of everything is a real Sannyasin."

As I come out of the room, I see Chaitanya Bharti standing there with his camera. I ask him if he will take a picture of me with Osho after discourse. He agrees to it. I tell him that after discourse I will go near Osho, where he should be available.

I sit down on the floor in the audience near the podium and close my eyes. I am in an "Aha" space. I have no clue of what is going on. There are about 400 to 500 people sitting in pin drop silence waiting to receive their master. In a couple of minutes I feel Osho’s presence near me and I open my eyes. He is right in front of me, standing with His folded hands, greeting His friends. I look upwards to see His face one more time to quench my unending thirst. He speaks nearly two hours, answering all kinds of questions.

After discourse, I walk towards Him and say, "Osho, I want to have a picture with you." He immediately agrees to it and I stand next to Him on His right side, and Chaitanya Bharti clicks his camera in seconds. This picture is my real treasure. When I receive it in the mail from Delhi, I take it to show to Osho.

Osho gazes at the picture for a minute and signs it with the message; "One who lets go of everything is a real Sannyasin."

Chapter 57

"Now you are a Sannyasin"

Meditation camp at Manali has started. Today, I go to see Osho in my regular clothes. He asks me, "Where is your orange dress? Why have you put it on?" I tell Him, "I will put it tomorrow."

Next morning, I am dressed in my orange lunghi and kurta and have come to see Him before discourse with my girl friend Veena from Bombay. We both are waiting in the living room with much excitement. After a few minutes, He comes out of the bathroom. His face is very radiant with an aura of light around Him. He greets me with a big smile as I go neat Him to touch His feet. He blesses me placing His hand on my head.

As I get up, He says, "You look good in this dress. Now you are a Sannyasin. What name should be given to you?" He places a huge Mala with big beads around my neck. I am just surprised, not knowing what is going on. I take it all as a joke and simply laugh. He looks at Veena, and the name ‘Jyoti’ slips out of her mouth. Osho likes this name and says, "It is good name but not complete. ‘Dharm Jyoti’ will be the right name for you." It all happens standing in the living room. That is how I am initiated into Sannyas. Not a big deal. I feel pulled towards Him and hug Him. He receives my hug, showering all His love on me by placing His hand on my head. I feel drowned in utter silence and joy.

Chapter 56

"It will look good on you"

Meditation camp will soon be happening in Manali. Today morning, He asks me if I like the orange colour dress of Laxmi. I say, “Yes Osho, it looks good on her.” He says, “It will look good in the meditation camp, the participants wearing the same colour. You get one dress made like Laxmi’s.” He gives the same message to Karuna also. We both agree to it.

Since that message, He has asked us three time if our orange dresses are ready. And our answer is the same, “Not yet.” There is still quite a time until the meditation camp. To my surprise today, I go to see Him and find this big pile of orange cloth sitting in one of the corners of His room. He asks me to cut the piece of cloth for my dress. I feel ashamed for not making my dress in time and giving Him all this trouble. Maybe I was not serious about it, but He looks serious. With the help of a friend, I cut four meters of cloth for me with shaky hands. Some unknown fear grips me and I am unable to look at Him. He calls me and I sit near His feet, with the bundle of cloth in my lap, looking at the floor.

He blesses me by keeping His hand on my head and says, “Get this dress made exactly in the same pattern as Laxmi’s. It will look good on you.” I look at His mischievously smiling face and get more confused, not understanding what He is up to.

Chapter 55

"The master is like a heavy cloud full of water..."

After the meditation camp at Nargol, Laxmi has started wearing orange color Lunghi and Kurta. Osho has appointed her as secretary and she comes to C.C.I. Chambers at 7:00am. Anyone wanting to see Osho has to take appointment from her. This is beyond my imagination. My mind is not ready to accept this new arrangement.

Everyday I am buying some roses from a blind boy who is selling them in a local train. Before starting dynamic, I am visiting Him in His bedroom to offer the flowers. I ask Osho about this appointment business started by Laxmi.

He laughs and says, "Don’t make it a problem. Just come before Laxmi arrives." I appreciate this great idea of my master and start coming fifteen minutes before Laxmi—and walk straight to His room. I feel it is not only me who wants to see Him, He is also waiting to see me.

Tonight, I heat Him saying in discourse, "The master is like a heavy cloud full of water, showering on those who are thirsty and ready to receive Him in their hearts. The disciple may feel grateful or not, but the master feels grateful towards those who have opened their heart towards Him."

He further adds, "This has never been said by masters before, but it is so. I am saying it from my own experience."

My head bows down in gratitude and I can't find any words to thank Him. I know He understands those hearts, which are beating in rhythm with His heart.

Chapter 54

"Don't hold, let go."

Osho has resigned from the university and has moved from Jabalpur to Bombay. He is staying as a guest in a three bedroom apartment at C.C.I.. Chambers which is rented by a friend for Him.

In one of the bedrooms, we-- may be eight friends-- do dynamic every morning from seven to eight. I am staying in the suburbs of Bombay and it takes me nearly an hour to reach there. One of the friends leads the meditation and the rest of us participate in it.

In the silent period of the meditation Osho comes in the room to see how we are doing today. I am sitting silently in Buddha posture and feel His presence near me.

He places His hand on my head and shakes it and whispers, "Don't hold, let go." And something happens. My whole body starts shaking, I start crying loudly. Some block inside is removed by His divine touch. I was never aware that I had suppressed so much inside me. I cry and cry for about half an hour and finally settle in deep silence.

I feel very relaxed and relieved of some invisible burden. A deep cleansing has happened in my psyche which may have taken years for me to do it on my own.

Thank you beloved master.

Thank you beloved master

Today is the last day in Pahalgaon. With Osho, sometime it feels the time has

stopped and at other times it feels it is running very fast. While I am busy packing, I hear the voice of this Muslim watchman, who is standing at the door. I ask him to come after an hour to help us carry our luggage to the car. As a token of his services, I give him twenty rupees, which he receives with thanks and leaves.

We are sitting on the verandah with Osho, ready to leave. The watchman comes and salutes Osho saying, "Aleikum Salaam". Osho smiles at him. He asks Osho if he can come to Bombay to serve Him. I can see tears in his eyes. He is deeply touched by Osho's love. Osho blesses him by placing His hand on his head, and asks me if I have given him some money. I tell Osho about giving him twenty rupees. Osho says, "Give him twenty more". Twenty rupees is quite an amount in these days. People hardly give five rupees as baksheesh to their servants. Osho has the heart of an emperor who is always ready to share to the maximum. I give the watchman twenty rupees more. While receiving it he holds my hand and starts crying. It touches me deeply and tears overflow from my eyes also. Thank you beloved master, for giving me this opportunity to open my heart to a stranger.

Chapter 52

"You are simply dreaming..."

Maharshi Mahesh Yogi is also in Pahalgaon with a group of Western disciples who have expressed their wish to talk to Osho. A meeting is arranged in the afternoon at an open lawn near a bungalow where Mahesh Yogi is staying with his disciples.

I take my little cassette recorder and join with two more friends in the car in which Osho is going. In nearly ten minutes, the car stops near a bungalow which has a beautiful big lawn in the garden. Lots of chairs are around. Mahesh Yogi is sitting on a chair talking to his disciples, who look very excited as we reach there. Osho namastes everyone with folded hands and sits on the chair next to Mahesh Yogi. I sit next to Osho with my recorder in my lap. There is no mike arrangement. Mahesh Yogi continues talking to his disciples for a while, explaining to them about the different paths leading

towards the same goal. I look at Osho, He is sitting with His eyes closed.

One of the Mahesh Yogi's disciple expresses his wish to hear Osho. There is pin drop silence for a moment. Osho opens His eyes, I am holding the microphone in my hand for recording His talk. Up till now, I have never heard Osho speaking in English to a group of westerners. May be it is His first talk in English. It is more like a dialogue than a discourse. I hear Him say, "There is no goal, the question of paths does not arise. All paths take you away from yourself. You are simply dreaming..."

Mahesh Yogi's disciples are conditioned by his teachings about different techniques. They start arguing with Osho. I can see they are not open and receptive, their minds are full of borrowed ideas. Still, Osho is answering their stupid questions for about an hour. Maharshi Mahesh Yogi looks very disturbed. Osho can destroy his whole business which is based on teaching people transcendental meditation. He does not allow Osho to finish His talk and interferes by trying to explain to his disciples that Osho's approach is different but He means the same thing. I am simply surprised by his stupidity. He is trying to protect himself by compromising with what Osho has said.

"That is a rare scene."

Every day lunch and dinner is sent in a tiffin for Osho and Kranti. After they finish their meal, I find lots of food is left over for Sheelu and me. We both enjoy eating the leftover food and feel happy for not having to go to the kitchen.

Today a bus is arranged to take every one for sight seeing. I am reluctant to go anywhere and not interested at all in sight seeing. My whole interest is to be with Osho. Some friends get annoyed with me. I don't understand it. I feel it is my choice and freedom to go or not. But they are determined to take me with them and start arguing.

Suddenly Osho comes out of the room and finding what is going on tells the friends to leave me alone. The friends become silent and everyone starts getting in the bus which is waiting there.

I have tears in my eyes. Osho looks at me and laughs which makes me laugh also.

He says, "Tears and smiles together. That is a rare scene."

It is good to be aware of it from the very beginning

After lunch Osho is resting in His room and I am sitting on the verandah

guarding. Three elderly Muslims walk in and say, " We want to see 'Peer-baba'." Peer-baba is an Urdu word which Muslims use for their masters. I tell them, "He is resting now" ; they could come back at 3:00pm.

They are just curious to know about Osho. To start with, one of them asks me if I am His daughter. Just to avoid unnecessary talk I simply say, "Yes." But I am wrong. It is not so simple as I thought. The other person asks, "Where is your mother?" Now I am in a dilemma, I don't know what to say. My real mother is no longer alive. Thinking of her, I say, "My mother has died." Feeling uneasy with them, I get up to go in and one of those three says, " Please, one more question. Do you have more sisters and brothers?" I take a deep breath. Things are going too far now. I feel stupid to start with a lie,

and look at them in silence.

To my great relief they leave and I hear one of them saying, "Poor girl, her mother has died and she is taking care of her father."

When I tell Osho the whole dialogue, He laughs and says, "So now you know how one lie leads to others. It is good to be aware of it from the very beginning."

Chapter 49

Loving strangers without any motive

It is very hard to burn this kerosene stove. It is giving lots of trouble. I have to clean its nipple with a pin very often and pump it for a while and somehow miraculously it burns up.

First I prepare tea and then keep the lid directly on the stove to make toast. Osho is having His breakfast on a little rectangular table placed in one corner of the kitchen. I keep the kitchen door open to keep the kerosene smell out. Today the watchman, who is a young handsome Muslim, comes to the door and bowing down towards Osho says, “Aleikum Salaam.” Osho greets him with His big heavenly smile and asks me to give him toast and tea.

But to my surprise the next day also this watchman comes at the same time and the whole incident is repeated again. Now I am sure it will repeat every day while we are there.

My intuition is not wrong, he comes every day for his tea and toast and I observe Osho is enjoying it. I feel Osho must be knowing my inner turmoil and anger against this man and is trying to bring it to the surface without saying a single word to me directly. Today I hear Him talking in discourse about unconditional love, loving strangers without any motive. Hearing this, I feel myself utterly stupid remembering the morning incident, and something clicks.

Next morning for the first time I receive the watchman with a open heart and give him toast and tea with love. Osho is watching it and when I look at Him, He gives me a sweet smile, acknowledging the change in my attitude towards the watchman.

Chapter 48

Don’t Forget..

In the morning at 8:00am, Osho is having His breakfast of toast and tea. Sheelu is helping me prepare the toast on the aluminum lid. Sheelu is helping me prepare the toast on the aluminum lid. Sheelu is a very quiet person, she hardly speaks.

While eating the toast, Osho says, "Sheelu hardly speaks, she is very quiet." I tell Osho, "Sheelu’s mother calls her devita (which means angel) because of her silent nature."

Osho laughs and says, "When my history gets written, don’t forget to mention that angels used to prepare toast for me."

Sheelu, me and friends who are present there all laugh at this remark of Osho’s, but inside I remind myself to remember what Osho has said.

Osho will be going by road in a car

After staying in Srinagar for a week it is decided to go to Pahalgaon. Pahalgaon is the most beautiful valley in Kashmir surrounded by mountains all around. I decide to go to Pahalgaon on horse with some friends through the mountains.

Osho will be going by road in a car. It is a very tedious journey by horse, especially when one does not know horse riding. Anyhow, totally exhausted we reach Pahalgaon. A few friends who have already reached are waiting to receive us. To my surprise, I am taken to the cottage where Osho is sitting in the verandah with some friends. I touch His feet and sit nearby on the floor. He enjoys listening to our tedious journey on horseback.

In a few minutes, Kranti comes out of the room and gives me a gesture to come. I get up and she takes me around to show the cottage. It has only one bedroom with attached bathroom, a little dining room and a big living room. At the back side of the cottage is a little room which is connected with the main cottage by a little pathway. I look in this room. There are two single beds kept near the side walls. There is a big window opening towards the mountains. It is quite neat and has a bathroom outside. Kranti asks me if I would like to stay there. Without any hesitation, I reply, “I will love to stay here, it is so close to Osho’s room.” I bring my suitcase and occupy that room with my girlfriend Sheelu from Bombay. Other cottages are quite at a distance from this cottage. The kitchen is also at quite a distance and it is decided the food will be sent in a tiffin for Osho and Kranti; Sheelu and I will walk to the kitchen to have our meals

A stove and a pot to prepare tea in the morning at our cottage is arranged. Osho likes to have toast and tea in the morning. No toaster is available. I find an aluminum lid of a pot to make toast on it. In the night I make sure that bread, butter, milk, sugar and tea leaves are kept ready for breakfast.

Osho looks very happy going around the cottage and decides to speak in the living room every morning and evening.

Chapter 45, One Hundred Tales for Ten Thousand Buddhas

Ma Dharm Jyothi

“Bhaiya, bhaiya”

Today Laxmi has arranged to go boating on Dal Lake. Osho, Sheelu and I arrive at the lake, where Laxmi is waiting for us. One shikara (little boat) is tied to a motor boat by a thick long rope. Laxmi, Sheelu and I get into the motor boat and Osho, with Kranti, sits in the shikara.

The motor boat is driven by a young Muslim boy who looks very excited to see his passengers. The motor boat goes fast pulling the shikara by a rope.

After a few minutes we hear Kranti calling us to stop. the motor boat stops and the Muslim boy pulls the rope of the shikara. When the shikara touches our boat, to our surprise, Osho gets up and jumps in the motor boat and Sheelu jumps in the shikara to be with Kranti.

Osho tells the driver that He wants to drive the boat. The driver gets up from the seat which Osho occupies and here we go. Osho drives so fast and zigzags away that the knot of the rope opens up and the shikara is left behind. I hear Kranti shouting, “Bhaiya, bhaiya” (which means big brother) -- but “Bhaiya” does not listen to her!

I am holding my breath, the boat could turn upside down any moment. The whole lake is in turmoil. I look at Laxmi and she smiles at me.

I think Osho is doing it purposely to give us this experience of being in danger and bringing our fear of death to the surface. I am sure I am going to drown any moment. Feeling helpless I close my eyes.

Finally the boat has slowed down and has touched the shore. I take a deep breath and wonder if I am still alive. Looking at us Osho gives us His heavenly mischievous smile.

Chapter 44, One Hundred Tales for Ten Thousand Buddhas

Ma Dharm Jyothi

A few friends join Him in the same boat

The meditation camp at Mount Abu ended with the full moon night. In the afternoon, I talk to friends about going boating in the night. We come up with the idea to tell Osho about it. When we ask Him, He says, "We should reserve all the boats and after the night meditation everyone can go boating."

People attending the meditation camp are just thrilled with the message about boating. All the boats are reserved and after the night meditation everyone rushes to the lake like little kids going for a picnic. When Osho arrives at the lake there are already about five hundred people waiting there in the garden. It looks very chaotic but surprisingly in a couple of minutes people fall in line on both sides making a path for Him. Osho never gives any discipline to His people but His mere presence creates the harmony. His people love and respect Him out of their understanding.

He walks towards the lake with folded hands, namasteing everyone. A few friends join Him in the same boat and the rest of us take other boats. It feels like a great celebration on the lake. All the boats are filled with sannyasins dancing and singing. I look at the full moon and imagine that moon god must be desiring to come down and join in our celebration.

Chapter 30

We have returned to Ahmedabad after a meditation camp at Mount Abu, where Osho introduced dynamic meditation in the morning.

He is curious to know the people’s opinions about dynamic meditation. When I tell Him that some friends were saying that you are loosening the screws of their brain, He laughs and says, "No, I am not interested in loosening the screws, they will tighten them again. I am trying to get the screws out of their brain because they are not needed there." Then He speaks about twenty minutes explaining that the whole process of dynamic meditation is to dehypnotize the conditioned mind of man. He further says: Dynamic meditation is a jet speed method. One hour daily for three months is enough to cleanse the whole rubbish.

He tells me a story

Today, after lunch, I tell Him that He should close the door to His room from the inside while resting because I also wanted to rest. He says, "People will come and knock on the door." I tell Him that I am closing the main entrance door of the apartment and will turn off the call bell also. I assure Him He won’t be disturbed. Seeing me determined about it, He says, "Okay, okay, do whatever you like." I take care of everything and go to my room and have a good afternoon nap. Thank God, no one has disturbed Him during His rest time.

While drinking His afternoon tea, He tells me a story, which I can never forget, because it is my story.

The story is :

There was a master living in a hut in the forest with his only disciple. They both were very lazy. One night they were lying on their beds and the master asked the disciple, "Can you go and find out if it is raining."

The disciple without moving an inch from his bed replied, "It is not raining because I just touched a cat who came in from the outside and it was not wet."

The master said, "Okay, close the door and let us sleep." Again the disciple without moving an inch replied, "Master, what is the need of closing the door? We have no fear of thieves and it feels good having the door open with the cool breeze coming in."

The master agreed to it and said, "Okay, turn the light off."

The disciple answered, "Master, two jobs I have done, this one you should do."

The way Osho narrates a story is so unique, one can visualize the whole scene as if it is happening now before you. And at the same time, it has some subtle meaning for you, if you can get it.

Hearing this story, I feel ashamed of what I had done in my unawareness, but Osho never allows anyone to feel guilty about anything.

Chapter 27

Will you work as my secretary?

This time, I have come along with Osho to Ahmedabad, where He is delivering a series of discourses on Geeta.

After the morning discourse, He has lunch at 11:30am and then rests for a couple of hours. I sit at the door on the stool to guard. It is a hot summer afternoon and I feel very sleepy and start dozing sitting on the stool. Just to keep myself awake I try to read a book. somehow, I manage to sit there and make sure that He is not disturbed in anyway.

At 2:00pm He comes out of the room and goes to the bathroom. I arrange tea for Him. Soon people will be arriving to meet Him personally. As I am pouring tea in the cup, He asks me, “Will you work as my secretary?” It is beyond my imagination and without giving a thought to it, I simply answer, “Osho, I need a secretary myself.” He says, “Your laziness is nothing compared to mine.” And He starts telling lots of stories about His laziness. I feel He is creating fiction stories. When I tell Him this, He says, “No, no, they are all facts.”

One story which I love is about keeping His bed near the door when He was a student and staying in a hostel. He would open the door and straight away jump on the bed. All His books were around and underneath the bed. He had nothing to do with the rest of the room.

I enjoy listening to His stories of laziness, which makes me feel free of my guilt of being lazy.

Chapter 26

One Hundred Tales for Ten Thousand Buddhas